Friday, April 6, 2012

One of "those" days.

It was one of those mornings. You know the ones. The little things pile up and before you can say "I need caffeine" you are grumpy. Then the straw. The one that "breaks mommies back" happens...

{thank you stupid insurance / pharmaceutical company that "covers" us for making the medicine that my son needs to breathe easy right now and deciding that you will not only stop your program that makes the co pay manageable. But, decide that you don't have to inform us that is is happening and i quote "because there isn't a law that says we have to". So, we not only get surprised when we go to pick it up that it is now 4 times as much but, it ends in me watching a woman in front of me far better dressed and all dolled up pick her 5 prescriptions for free {that didn't help and I don't know her circumstance but, GAH!}. So our options as tax paying, law abiding, people who have insurance are to pay this crazy number or have my kid suffer. It is rather infuriating and we can afford {thank god} it but, should we HAVE to pay so much for it? It's just so ridiculous to me. Especially when the last time we got it, it was 1/4 of the price. //end soapbox.}

So in all of this you end up in tears at WALMART of all freaking places {one of my finest moments I can tell you} and you snap at the little person. Who is in reality just being little and has no idea any of this is even happening. So you feel like an asshole {there is no other word}, take a deep breath and apologize to him for getting frustrated when it wasn't his fault. He looks at you, asks you what frustrated means and when you explain it just means really grumpy. He says "I FORGIVE YOU MOMMY".

::cue more tears:: I must have eaten the awesome sauce last night people. I was on a roll with the tears today.

So on this Good Friday. I am reminded I not only that I have so much to be thankful for.
That their is a medicine that helps him breathe that won't make him shake and have him begging us to make it stop, that we can afford it, that daddy doesn't think I am crazy when I call him upset from walmart, that in minutes my best friend, mom and dad had all called to check on me, friends texting me, really that I have a huge silver lining in all of this.  
That at the end of the day. I have everything to be thankful for. That we have a Father in heaven that forgives us not only for our crazy everyday but, sent his Son to die for that crazy. It took a three year old to remind me of this mercy today.


Cisilia "cc" said...

RA, life can be unreasonable and hard sometimes. BOO to bad days. And Praise God for all things good like realizing the blessings of your precious boy!! I remember you forgiving me many times when you were younger. Such a loving baby you were and still are! Xo mom

Brown Girl said...

Ugh, I'm sorry that happened to you. I think we all have those days where life gets us down, and we yell at the little people (I've done that a time or two and wanted to punch myself afterwards), hang in there girl. I hope you and your sweet little boy have a great weekend!